Because I'm HAPPY

HELLO my dear friends and family!

It is a BEAUTIFUL day here in San Lorenzo Honduras, and I am happy to report that EVERYTHING IS AWESOME.

Yeah, Lego Movie. Just watch it. Just do it.
But seriously, guys, I have never been happier.  I don’t even know where to begin. It has been a week of miracles - a week of magic, to say the least.  The truth is, I'm not planning on telling all the specifics - honestly, there's just too much and some of it is just... impossible to put into words. But, it is enough to say that God really truly is watching over us.  He's more real than we understand - and everything we read about really happened.... and those same things can happen today. And... They really do.

Now, I don't have a lot to report, just a few little updates, so that you guys have an idea of what's going on in my life here!

First - Elder Batista and I are great. We work well together and he's super chill.  He likes to burst out in random song in the mornings, and we have a portable piano that plays jazzy battle hymns and old school classical ’day at the races’ kind of music.  Basically, our mornings are rarely boring. Nor our daily walking. Nor our nightly planning sessions.

Secondly - Amapala is growing. We have a lot of blessings on the way, and you all already know that I'll keep you updated on any big things that happen. And, as one of these occurences, this week we had 34 people in church - which means that we might be needing a new meeting place, if it keeps up!

Thirdly - ..... I've been in the mission for a long time. .... Like, a really long time.

Fourthly - I AM SO HAPPY. Life is just good right now. Work is great, the feeling is great, and our vibe is GREAT.

Lastly - I apologize that i don't write a lot.  I just... find that there's  so much to say and no way to say it.  I'll always write little things here and there - but if you want to know all the stuff i could actually tell you... You'll have to ask me face to face in a few months. ;D 

But anyway.. I love you all. SO much.  Just remember that.  I'm always here for each and every one of you.

Elder Kristian Huff

Holy Nights

My Beloved Family and Friends,

I find myself here, at the edge of a new page, ready to turn.  I have thought a lot about today and what I'd like to tell you all as the only full year of my mission comes to an end - and I think I finally have found the words to say.  I sincerely pray that the Spirit may convey my words to your hearts, that you might know the love and gratitude and sincerity that I wish to express.  I have thought a million times that a single weekly letter can do little for a person - but perhaps a yearly letter might have more worth.  So, if I had to write a letter to summarize an entire year of a life - of my life - this would be the letter.  

When I began this year, I entered in a prayer.  I begged my Heavenly Father to allow this year to shape me as I dedicated myself to Him.  I had many doubts about myself being a missionary - I felt as if I would never be the kind of missionary that could actually do the work of the Lord.  I didn't know how to work.  I couldn't speak the language well.  I didn't feel like I was good enough.  And as the year went on - I realized... I was right.  I DIDN'T know how to work as a representative of the Lord.  I DIDN'T speak the language well.  And frankly, I WASN'T good enough.  Now, I make none of these remarks to degrade myself or make it seem like I was useless as of a year ago - that would be a mistake, and a lie.  I had potential.  I had nerve.  I had a firm, great desire to be better.  And THAT.... That is all that was required - and that has been 2015.  Let me explain.

Christ, in one of His many parables, compared the Kingdom of God to a mustard seed.  He explained that such a tiny, humble seed, if properly nurtured, would eventually grow to become a great tree.  Alma, a prophet in the Book of Mormon, taught a similar comparison, as he elaborated the manner in which we nourish our faith as if it were a seed.  He explains that if one only has the DESIRE to believe - God could make that faith stronger.  In another parable, Christ explains that we ought to be cautious of putting our love in things of the world, explaining that worldly desires lead to disappointment (as explained by a remarkable playwright, 'you can't take it with you', in the end), recognizing that such things can be attacked by time and outside forces.  Christ then explains that wheresoever we put our treasure, then, our heart would most surely follow.

These two parables have had a great impact on me during this year.  As I consider the implications of both parables, I have come to realize that they are deeply intertwined.  Any given desire that one decides to plant will always begin to grow - be it a righteous or evil desire.  As Christ also stated, the world rejected the light because it loved the darkness more - and this love was a result of it's own continued wicked acts and works.  Thus - we see that if one plants a seed of evil, it will definitely grow, if one continually gives it opportunity to do so.  And as one places their treasure in those evil things - their heart, in a very real sense, slowly grows more evil.  Slowly, but surely, all desire and love turns to, simply said, bad things.  I'm sure you've all seen this, be it in yourself or a loved one - it seems that one bad decision rapidly leads to another, until so many decisions are winded together, it seems impossible to escape.  

This is what the adversary wants us to think.  He wants us to feel trapped and lost, as if there is no hope.  He would have us convinced that once the seed has began to grow, it has all been lost.  'Now there is no chance,' he would say, 'you've already made the decision far too many times.  Now there is no turning back.  You are now one of THEM - one of the BAD ones.  Therefore, just keep doing those bad things.  It will be too hard to change now...'  

My Beloved Family and Friends, I have been blinded by these same dirty, filthy lies far too many times.  And now, having had those dark seeds cleaned from my mind and heart, I can testify before the world that those words are exactly that - lies.  So now, allow me to explain what 2015 has done for me - and I will do it by continuing the parable.

When this year began, I had many bad seeds that were still planted in my heart.  I had been smart enough to have torn away the branches of bad habits that had formed, and I had believed that I was done with those dark seeds that were planted, even years and years before.  So, what was the problem?  As we all know, you can tear away the leaves, but if you do not uproot the seed, the leaves will always grow back.  But HOW?  How was I to rip out those hated and cursed seeds that had destroyed my peace for so many years?  I had spent so many nights broken and hurting and felt as if I had no way to make it end.  What was the secret?

What occurred is nothing short of a miracle for me.  Until now, even as I've been writing these words have I come to understand.  Those seeds are NOT the acts we commit.  Any seed planted is not planted by making any kind of outward decision.  When a seed is planted, it is because one planted something much more simple than an act - one only needs plant a desire.  So, I planted several desires.  I desired to know how to work.  I desired to speak the language well.  I desired to be good enough to represent the Lord Jesus Christ.  And those desires were planted in my heart, and even when I failed to do the things I wanted, I had trusted in someone much more experienced to make sure that the seeds had chance to grow.

Finally, after years of searching for answers - I found them. I had planted good seeds.  I had been taking care of them to the best of my ability, and I felt as if my heart itself had started to change.  I was almost there.  But I was confused.  I had spent years before trying to plant the SAME good seeds.  I had tried to find peace in many different ways, but FINALLY it worked.  And How?  What was the difference?

The answer is the same answer I give when one asks me why I'm serving a mission.  The answer is simple, and it is an answer that is now deeply rooted in my heart.  I declare it before all the world, that what we look for comes in no other way.  

The Gospel of the Saviour of the World, Jesus Christ.  

It changed everything.  There are many beliefs in this world.  At times we feel lost and confused, due to the many seeds that are planted in the hearts of many.  But the Gospel has not changed, nor will it ever.  Through the Gospel, purpose is found.  Hearts are cleansed and healed.  Peace is achieved.  Love becomes the center of all we do.  Every question that one could have and every doubt that will arise can be answered through Him and the great plan that He made possible.  It is personal.  It is REAL.  It is POSSIBLE.  And it does not require anything more than what's possible.  All that the Gospel requires - is the desire.  A single, tiny, humble seed of desire to do better.  

To conclude my thoughts - I have fallen many times, even during my mission.  I have made mistakes and I've felt like giving up.  But what carried me through all those moments?  Well.... The exact thing that began the journey.  With every bad decision I've made this whole year - I have never let a day end without fixing it with my Heavenly Father during those silent, holy nights knelt by the side of my bed.  I'm not yet all that I hope to be - but I'm much more than I ever was before.  Because finally I've found what I was looking for - I'm Happy. 

Allow yourselves the opportunity to try.  Allow yourself to fail.  Allow yourself to learn.  Allow yourself to plant another little seed - by just having a simple talk with He who knows all that you need and hope.  I promise, it can, and will, all change. I love each and every one of you.  These have been my experiences of this year - and now I hope that these trees that have began to grow will help others as they search for the fruit that I hope to give.  That was my 2015, and that will be my 2016.  Thank you for your support - I love you all.  And remember - He lives. And you can know as well.

Elder Kristian Huff

Silent Nights

Hey Everybody.

Sorry I haven't been very good about writing lately - the time just goes by way too fast, and then I find myself without a message for you all.  But, today I think I have time, so.... I thought I'd write a special kind of message in two parts.  As we come to the end of another year, I find myself closing the only full year in the which I'll be serving in Honduras.  2015 was that year - my one full year.  And as it closes - I find myself reflecting a lot on what I've accomplished and learned during this year.  And seeing as I have the blessing of writing the first half of the message on the 24th and the second part on the 31st - I feel that I should take advantage of the situation to tell you the things that have had the most effect on me during this year. So.... I think I'll just start.

To begin, I want to take a look at where I was during this year to be able to describe a little better the things I want to tell you. 

December 10th - January 21st:  Danli - Elder Tuft

January 21st - April 15th:  Villa Olimpica - Elder Naupoto

April 15th - July 8th:  Villa Olimpica - Elder Putnam

July 8th - September 30th:  San Marcos - Elder Espinoza

September 30th - November 11th:  San Marcos - Elder Rogers

November 11th - December 9th:  Amapala - Elder Huaman

December 9th - Now:  Amapala - Elder Batista

So - the run down.  During the year 2015, I have had 4 areas and 7 companions. I have seen many baptisms and many reactivations in that time, as well as seen many struggles amongst those who are still searching.  I have seen tragedies and miracles.  I have seen conversion take place in some while doubt and pride blind others.  I've seen love and hate, acceptance and rejection, tears of joy and tears of pain, sickness and health, war and peace and every extreme I think one could list.  From every area I've learned more and more what it means to be a good person and even more about being a good missionary.  From each companion I've learned a million lessons, and for each companion I've developed a deep love and respect.  

And... To be totally honest, I doubt that words will ever be able to express all that I've learned in this year. I wish I could find words to put the whole thing together, but I think that what I wanted to tell you more than anything, is that the most important moments didn't happen during lessons or during a moment in the font.  The most important moments of this year, the ones that had the largest effect on me, occured during those quiet moments in the night time, kneeled at the side of my bed.  That's why the first of the two messages is called silent nights - because this Christmas, all I can do is marvel at how much I've learned during those silent, peaceful nights talking to God.  

This year has been the biggest year in learning about the plan that He has and our part in that plan.  And those silent nights were the moments that I had, being able to come to know who God is - and it amazes me to understand that we were probably all in awe during that precious moment, during a silent night many years ago, when the world came to know her god in the flesh - that precious night when the saviour of the world was born.  And more and more, I'm coming to understand all that can happen in one quiet, peaceful, silent night.  

So, as the first part of the message of the new year to you all, I just want to beg you all to not lose those moments.  Take advantage of those silent nights, where you will be able to allow yourself to see your life through Heaven's Eyes.  I will actually be talking a lot more about that in next week's letter - but please.... Start tonight, and kneel and make the habit and the determination to talk more with God.  Please - it makes all the difference.  And just as that same gesture prepared me for this year, I hope that it will be an appropriate preparation for all that I'll try to put in words next week.  I love you all, and I hope you'll all take time to talk to God about He whom we celebrate during this time.  Remember Christ during this Christmas. I know I'll be thinking about Him a lot.

I love you - Merry Christmas, my beloved friends and family.

Elder Kristian Huff

The Ocean

Hi All -

Well, this is unfortunately not Kristian writing - it is his mother.  He apologizes again for not having a message for you.  The area he is at has very poor internet service, so instead of sending a message...he sent pictures!  Amazing pictures!!!

Just an update...he is currently on a beautiful island, Amapala.  It is a difficult place and also an amazing place for missionaries.  They have come across some very mean and brash individuals, but on the other hand they have come across some of the most loving and caring individuals - a couple families namely that love the missionaries and would do anything for them (makes my heart happy to hear those stories).

They had changes this week and he had to say good-bye to Elder Huaman, whom he loved dearly and is really going to miss.  His new companion is Elder Batista, who is an incredible missionary and Elder Huff has really enjoyed getting to know him.

Before Elder Huaman left, there was a little miracle and he was able to baptize a sweet girl that has been having the missionary discussions for several months - she didn't want Elder Huaman to leave until he baptized her, so she prayed about being baptized and...well, we all know what happened next!

Not only was Elder Huaman able to baptize before he left, but there was also another sweet woman who has an incredible testimony and she has been wanting to be baptized for several months and asked Kristian if he would baptize her.  YES - Kristian also got to baptize in the ocean!

We finally have pictures also from Carlos and Judith's baptism from San Marcos - they are both amazing individuals!

I hope you enjoy the pictures!  There will be a message next week from Elder Huff!

Thank you to everyone who reads his updates, prays for him and loves him.  Your support is very much felt and appreciated by all of us.  Kristian loves you all and is so overwhelmed by the love he feels from each and everyone of you!

Tara

Elder Espinoza, Carlos, Judith and Elder Huff

The bus ride on the way to Choluteca for Carlos and Judith's baptism

Elder Huff, Judith and Carlos - Congratulations!!!

The ocean on Amapala - the day of the baptism!

They got to be baptized in the ocean

Elder Huff and Elder Huaman and the newest members in Amapala

A baptism in the ocean - amazing!!!

Weeks like Days

Hey everybody!

There's always so much to say and I'm just not good at finding the words to say them.  I suppose there's always something in my mind that I want to tell you - but then the words just stop as I begin to say them.  It's just not the same as saying them face to face, you know?  For example, I remember something a missionary told me when I was beginning my mission.  He said,

'The mission is like this, Elder Huff:  The days feel like weeks, and the weeks feel like days.'

And, at first, I understood the first part perfectly.  I LOVED the work, but OHHH the days went by slow!  But... Then, all of a sudden.... The days don't feel long.  The feel too short.  And before you know it.... Several weeks have passed and you barely had a moment to watch it go by.  Guys, it breaks my heart.  But incredibly, thanks to several friends and family this week, I was reminded of a very special celebration that we hold in the States (it doesn't exist here - obviously) that happens to fall on the day that I get to write you.  

So.... Those weeks that seem more like days end up making me reflect on how beautiful this world is.  How amazing it is to be a part of this world, in all its perfections and imperfections. I end up just being humbled by the love shown by so many and lives that have such an effect on each other - so, maybe it's typical, but with all my heart I want to write a letter of gratitude.  So... Here goes.

First, I want to express my gratitude for all of my dear friends back at home.  You have all had such an effect on me, and I want you to know how much I love you.  Everyone from Satori, from Theater, from Dance Co., from the Scera and Hale, from the Springville Playhouse, from Cries of Freedom, friends from school, friends from the city, friends from everywhere.  I love you all so dearly, and I MISS you.  When I come back, I'll do all that I can to let you know how much I care for each of you - so thank you for being a part of my life.

Next, I want to express my thanks for Danli.  Beginning in the most beautiful, peaceful and homely area was a welcome to Honduras that I will always be grateful for.  I love everyone there - my ward, my investigators, my converts, every hill and colonia, and every day I got to spend learning about the mission from wonderful missionaries who welcomed me in.  I love you all, and thank you.  I'll see you soon.

Then, my beloved family in the Villa Olimpica.  I feel like there's very little I can say.  Just... Thank you.  To every person who had something to do with me while I was there, thank you.  You are those who made me feel like Honduras and Teguc were my own - and as I said before, I plan on keeping my promises to all of you.  I love you.

One of the hardest ones I'll have to give is thanks for San Marcos.  That place is my little piece of heaven.  Our time went by very fast... Too fast.  But during that time, I came to know some of the best people in this world.  Stay strong - your day will come.  Thank you for letting me be a part of you.  I thank God every day that He let me be there -  and someday I'll try to give back a little that you gave me.

Amapala - we're on the way.  I'll be telling a lot of stories in the coming weeks about you, Amapala - so in the meantime, I'll be showing you my gratitude every day for the coming months.

Next, I'm thankful for the mission.  I'm grateful that God let me come here - it has changed everything.  I love it.  I love the lessons I've learned, the people I've met, the places I've been, the person it's let me become.  I'm not who I hope to be - but thanks to this amazing gift, I'm on the way. I'm grateful for this opportunity, more than any other opportunity I've had.  

I'm thankful for my family.  My Mom, my Dad, Nanny and Jakob, my brothers and Chemo and Ya Ya and all the Greenwood's, all of my beloved cousins and sisters and aunts and uncles and all those who have been a part of my life as I've come to this point - what amazes me more and more, is that everything we learn in the gospel comes down to all of YOU.  My Family. I love you.  More than words can say, I Love You.  Thank you - I wish I could thank each of you personally, but that's gonna have to wait until I get home - until then, Thank You.  

Finally.... I'm thankful for my Family in Heaven.  I'm grateful for what they've given me and all they've done for me.  The honest truth is, that's all I can say.  Anything else is too personal for specifics - but all that they've taught me, the Gospel, the Fall and the Atonement, the apostasy and the restoration, the commandments, they ordinances, the opportunity to hold the Holy Priesthood, to be a missionary, to know that there is so much that we don't know, and so much we've already done and so much we still have to do gives me a peace and a confirmation of everything I knew in my heart that just needed to be connected to words and doctrine - and I will forever, eternally be grateful for those truths.  I love the Gospel and every truth that has come with it. I love my Saviour and I stand as a witness of His divine calling and life - it is all true.  Read the books.  Say your prayers. Keep the commandments.  And then - you'll know, just like I do.

Once again, I love each and every one of you.  These are my sincere and short words for this Thanksgiving - I hope you can feel the love I truly do have for each and every one of you.  I will see you soon.

Elder Kristian Huff

Song of the Week - Hey Soul Sister

The Only Constant is Change

Hey everybody!!!

So... I don't even know where to begin.  I've had some HUGE things happen this week....  And, I guess I'll start with this.  There are two big things that happened this week, so.... Just read along and it'll be pretty clear.

First, my p-day has changed, due to the fact that I have officially left San Marcos.  The change was coming, and.... I suppose it was my time to leave.  It was hard saying goodbye.  In a way, San Marcos felt a little like my baby - I got to see it grow so much, and I had the opportunity to meet and come to love so many incredible people.  It was hard - and there's a little piece of my heart that will forever remain there.  I will also miss my second baby, Elder Rogers, but I'm sure he'll do just fine - plus, the missionary going in is a really good, hardworking missionary.  So.. I'm not too worried.  I hope that in the near-future we get to see San Marcos reach its potential - so, all in the Lord's time.  Until then - I love you San Marcos and all my Sanmarquitos, I'll be missing you.

BUT - that then begs the question, where am I now?  Well... My dear friends and family, I've just been transferred to one of the craziest areas of the mission.  I'm still in the South, but now I'm in the HOT part of the South,  And it isn't just hot because we're south - I actually am close to a beach.  And... By close, I mean, I live on the beach.  More or less.  You see, the weird thing about this area, is that I don't just take a bus to get to my area - you actually have to take a boat as well.  So... I'm in an area called Amapala.  And this area is crazy - because it is an isolated island off the coast of Honduras in San Lorenzo - you can google search it.  It's in the pacific Ocean and it is BEAUTIFUL.  We're also a small little group of members here in Amapala, barely having more than 20 members or something along those lines regularly in church - so, a lot like San Marcos.  But, because of the situation, I will now be writing on Thursdays until further notice.  So, I'll be keeping you updated!  

So - that's the first part of the two.  The next one has something to do with a LOT of people - but not just Honduran people.  Yeah, there were a lot of Hondurans involved as well, namely from my beloved Villa Olimpica - as well as several americans and dear friends and family, as well as several MISSIONARIES and, yeah, you can believe it, my MISSION PRESIDENT and his WIFE. I really don't know how many read this blog, nor do I know how many of you are aware of something that my mom has been planning for the past... well, the past YEAR or so.... But, if you were/are in on it..... I got it Yesterday.

.........

OH MY GOSH MOTHER YOU ARE CRAZY.  AND SO ARE ALL OF YOU.  I'll have pictures of everything up next week - I haven't had a ton of time to prepare because of the changes, but HOW did you all manage to take part in it and how did I NOT know for SOOOOOO long????  OH my heavens, for those that don't know, the WHOLE past year, my mom has been carrying along with her a big sign that says 'Happy Birthday Elder Huff' - and SEVERAL of YOU have pictures with that poster from all kinds of different events - be it from special places of ours or be it big moments in your lives that I couldn't participate in - it seems like I was still a little involved!  OH MY GOSH it is insane! 

BUT, my dear friends and family, your secret participation was then driven to a WHOLE new level, when I opened up a page, and there was my MISSION PRESIDENT with a similar poster, followed by SEVERAL MISSIONARIES FROM MY MISSION WHO ARE CURRENTLY SERVING DOING THE SAME THING.  HOW IN THE WORLD DID THAT HAPPEN? Well, I am at least aware that it was in large part thanks to Odeth Cerrato (girl, you are crazy too.  THANK YOU so much.  You have no idea how much that meant to me - but I'll write more about what you did in a moment.), to President and Hermana Bowler, to the AP's, ZL's AND the Hermana Training Leaders, as well as many other missionaries and people involved in the mission honduras Tegucigalpa.  YOU ARE ALL WONDERFUL and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.  I was kind of freaking out, and my new comp, Elder Huaman, was laughing pretty hard when even HE showed up in the pictures.  I love you all so dearly - I feel honored to be serving at your side.  You are the best of the best, and I'll be sure to tell each of you individually in the coming weeks.

BUT, STILL NOT OVER.  In addition to all of the missionaries that were in on this - and I still thank you all with all my heart - I then was shocked to see many deeply beloved and sorely missed faces from a place I was in not too long ago - the wonderful ward of the Villa Olimpica.  So - First off, Odeth, I thank you dearly for all that you did.  I do not deserve such an amount of love and support, and the fact that you played such an inctricate role in this whole thing just - blows my mind and humbles me so much - there are no words of gratitude.  So, Odeth, do me one more favor - make sure that all of my dearly beloved friends and family from the Villa read this next part, okay?

Mis queridos hermanos y hermanas de la Villa Olímpica - o, mejor dicho, mi amada familia, 

Ya recibí el regalo que mi mamá estaba preparando - el cual consiste en muchas fotos de USTEDES con un cartel para mis cumpleaños.  PUCHIKA, si solo hubieran podido visto mi cara cuando abrí ese álbum LLENO de fotos suyas!  Les AGRADEZCO con todo mi corazón - ustedes son maravillosos y no hay palabras para expresar mi gratitud.  Les amo MUCHO.  Voy a traer el libro la otra semana para que yo pueda escribir un poco de todas las fotos - pero, hasta entonces, ustedes tienen que saber que yo les extraño a ustedes demasiado.  Ustedes hicieron tanto para mi, y de repente, encuentro que todavía están haciéndome montón de cosas... Les hice una promesa, y la voy a guardar.  Voy a verles bien pronto, si solo es para recordarles de mi amor para con ustedes y para decirles que realmente son las mejores personas en este mundo.  Doy gracias a mi Padre Celestial por haberme dado la oportunidad de conocerles - y nuestra amistad perseverará  por muchos años que sigan. Gracias por todo - y otra vez, les amo.

And the same goes for all of my dear friends and family from all over the world - I love you all.  Thank you again.  I'll probably write a little more about all of it next week as well - so, until then, I love you all, every last one of you.  May God bless you and keep you.

Elder Kristian Huff

Song of the week - Dedicated to Odeth Cerrato - You've Got a Friend in Me (Latino style!!!)  Thank you Odeth, this gift would not have been the same if it were not for your help!!!  (Love, Mama)

And That's 15

Hey everybody!

It is a great day here in Honduras, and sadly I don't have much to report for the week cause I got hit with something bad in the stomach - so I was pretty much out cold the majority of this week.  And then my kid got it too.  So then he was in bed for a little while too.  

But it's getting better!  That's what is most important.  ;D  Sometimes, little things like that come and you just - kind of have to deal with it!  But I actually learned an interesting lesson this week because of it, even if it was just a little personal revelation, as small as it was.  

I don't claim to be the best missionary - I know I'm not.  But I am not one who doesn't want to be out working, either.  I don't like being inside when I know that there's people that need my help, and the ONLY time I will not be outside during the day is if... well.... I'm sleeping.  And the only time we sleep here during the day whilst on the mission is.... when you're sick. And you don't want to do anything else.  So... That's pretty much what happened this week.  Now, what I learned, though, is this:  

AGENCY IS REAL. 

I don't mean to say that 'if you truly have faith, it doesn't matter if you're sick, you work anyway!' Faith without works is dead - and if I have faith I'll get better, I should probably put that faith to work and get the rest necessary so that you can get out ASAP.  Better than drag the sickness out for like, 2 months (right, Mom?).  And here's what I learned about agency this week:  depending on how you use your agency, you'll see the consequences come, but you are not able to choose said consequences.  They just come.  So, you can choose when you want to push yourself, but you cannot choose what happens to you because you pushed yourself.  The principle of agency really is a simple one, but I want to reveal a little of an idea that I had.

The ONLY way that we can truly be instruments in God's hands, is by giving our agency back to Him.  I'm CERTAIN you've heard that before.  BUT, that doesn't mean just go through the checklist of things He's laid out (although in most cases, that list won't lead you astray), but rather that you must take part in an ACTIVE ask and receive process of communication with God.  THAT is what it means to give our agency to God.  There are times, for instance, when we're sick, when things NEED to get done.  God knows that.  Here in the mission, for example, I'm pretty sure that God knows that there's people that need to hear.  But, giving your agency to God DOES NOT mean getting up and going to work all day anyway, when you won't be able to teach effectively because you feel so crappy you can't focus.  That seems pretty OPPOSITE of what God would say.  But it doesn't mean just going to bed every time you feel under the weather either.  What giving your agency to God means, is ASKING Him what it is He needs for you in that moment.  It might mean get a blessing, get up and work.  Many missionaries can testify that such occurrences have passed.  It might also mean take a couple of days to get back together - maybe God has a plan for what's happened and can use that time to prepare people for when you can go out again.  

It's a delicate line that only God Himself knows - But He's ready and willing to tell us everything.  All we have to do is ask.  He listens.  And most importantly, He Answers.

I love you all, and you're all in my prayers.  Stay Strong always, and know that God is with you.  May we all learn to depend more on the Lord every day.  I LOVE YOU ALL ONCE AGAIN.

Elder Kristian Huff

 

Song of the week: We're Just People by Madilyn Page